Will parents be held responsible for their children on the day of judgement?

Question - Are we just responsible of our own actions on the day of judgement? Or we will be questioned concerning those who are under us?

Answer - A person will be accountable for his actions as well as the actions of those under his care. The Hadith of Rasulullah Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam states that:

عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ عُمَرَ، أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ ‏ "‏ أَلاَ كُلُّكُمْ رَاعٍ وَكُلُّكُمْ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْ رَعِيَّتِهِ فَالأَمِيرُ الَّذِي عَلَى النَّاسِ رَاعٍ عَلَيْهِمْ وَهُوَ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْهُمْ وَالرَّجُلُ رَاعٍ عَلَى أَهْلِ بَيْتِهِ وَهُوَ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْهُمْ وَالْمَرْأَةُ رَاعِيَةٌ عَلَى بَيْتِ بَعْلِهَا وَوَلَدِهِ وَهِيَ مَسْئُولَةٌ عَنْهُمْ وَالَعَبْدُ رَاعٍ عَلَى مَالِ سَيِّدِهِ وَهُوَ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْهُ فَكُلُّكُمْ رَاعٍ وَكُلُّكُمْ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْ رَعِيَّتِهِ ‏"‏ ‏.‏

Translation: 'Abdullah bin 'Umar: The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) as saying: Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The amir (ruler) who is over the people is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock.

1. a man is a shepherd in charge of the inhabitants of his household and he is responsible for his flock.
2. a woman is a shepherdess in charge of her husband's house and children and she is responsible for them.
3. a man's slave is a shepherd in charge of his master's property and he is responsible for it.

So each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock'.

A person should therefore do his utmost effort to nurture his child in the best of manner and inculcate in him Islamic values in order to absolve himself from his responsibilities. However, if in spite of all his tiring efforts, the child still opts for the wrong path, then one should make Istighfaar for his shortcomings and also have hope in Allah that Allah will not take him to task for it because Allah Himself says in the Quraan:

لاَ يُكَلِّفُ اللّهُ نَفْساً إِلاَّ وُسْعَهَا (2:286) Allah does not charge a soul except [with that within] its capacity.

As for Nooh alaihis salaam, we cannot use his incident as a scapegoat. Quraan speaks of his exhausting dawah to his people and specifically to his son. His last word to his son was actually Dawat to Allah as recorded in Surah Hood. We can conclude that Nooh alaihis salaam did not leave any stone unturned in giving Dawah to his family. We should therefore exert ourselves fully in the upbringing of our children and abstain from giving them such gadgets and devices that will lead to their spiritual doom and destruction.

Some basic rights of children are mentioned below:

Children have the right to be fed, clothed, educated, and protected until they reach adulthood. Protection means protection against moral and physical harm.

2. Parents should give a good name to their child.

3. It’s the responsibility of parents to develop the child’s personality in all fields.

In Islam education is not limited to bookish knowledge but includes moral and religious training also. It means healthy all-round growth of child’s personality by giving them both religious and bookish knowledge or we can say worldly knowledge. It is famous Hadith of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him) in which He (Peace be upon him) said:

“The best of you is one who gives a good education (intellectual and moral) to his children.”

4. Children need to be loved, kissed, and be given special treatment by their parents. Parents should treat their children with love and leniency but in some cases where they need strictness, it is also allowed.

5. Parents should teach children Islamic manners and etiquettes in accordance with the beautiful example of the Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him).

6. Parents should also give them learning to read and recite the Qur’an from an early age when the child’s memory finds it easy.

7. It also includes the development of the regular performance of Prayer between the ages of 7 and 10.

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